10 Common Myths About Divorce Debunked

Divorce is a challenging process that often comes with misconceptions. That’s why our firm is committed to offering dependable guidance and support during this life-changing event. With accurate information and skilled legal assistance, you can face the process with greater confidence and understanding.

At Keystone Family Law in Vancouver, Washington, we combine our passion for family law with the flexibility of a virtual platform to make legal services more accessible. Below, we’ll explore some of the most common myths about divorce and reveal the truths behind them.

Myth 1: Divorce Is Always Adversarial

A common belief is that divorce inevitably turns into a hostile battle. While disagreements can arise, not all divorces are adversarial.

• Amicable divorces: Many couples work together to reach fair agreements, especially when focusing on shared goals like co-parenting. Cooperative divorces often result in better outcomes for everyone involved.

• Alternative dispute resolution: Options like mediation and collaborative divorce offer less confrontational ways to resolve issues without going to court. These methods focus on compromise rather than conflict.

• Benefits of cooperation: When couples communicate effectively, they often save time, money, and emotional energy compared to prolonged legal battles. Cooperation can also lead to healthier post-divorce relationships.

Understanding that divorce doesn’t have to be combative can encourage a more constructive approach.

Myth 2: Mothers Always Get Custody of the Children

It’s often assumed that mothers are automatically awarded custody, but this isn’t true. Family courts prioritize the child’s best interests, and both parents are evaluated equally.

• Factors considered: Courts assess each parent’s ability to provide stability, emotional support, and a safe environment for the child. Judges aim to create arrangements that promote the child’s well-being.

• Joint custody options: Shared custody arrangements are becoming more common, emphasizing the importance of both parents' involvement in the child’s life. These agreements can foster a sense of normalcy for children.

• Fathers’ rights: It’s essential to recognize that fathers have just as much right to seek custody as mothers. Fathers who actively participate in their children’s lives are often awarded significant parenting time.

If you’re concerned about custody arrangements, consult a family law professional to understand your options.

Myth 3: Divorce Is Too Expensive

Many people worry that divorce will drain their finances. While costs can vary, there are ways to make the process more affordable.

• Virtual law firms: Firms like Keystone Family Law offer lower overhead costs, making legal services more accessible. Virtual consultations also save clients time and transportation expenses.

• Flat fees and payment plans: Some divorce lawyers provide transparent pricing or flexible payment options to accommodate clients’ budgets. These arrangements make quality legal support within reach for many.

• Efficient processes: Collaborative methods and well-prepared documentation can help minimize legal fees. Proper planning often leads to smoother proceedings and reduced costs.

Affordability doesn’t mean compromising on quality representation. It’s about finding solutions that align with your needs.

Myth 4: Prenuptial Agreements Are Only for the Wealthy

Prenuptial agreements are often seen as tools for the rich, but they can benefit anyone entering a marriage.

• Protecting assets: A prenup helps safeguard individual property, business interests, or family heirlooms. These agreements clarify ownership before marriage.

• Clarifying financial responsibilities: It sets clear expectations about managing finances during the marriage. This can prevent misunderstandings and disagreements later.

• Preventing disputes: Prenups simplify divorce proceedings by resolving property division in advance. Couples who prepare prenups often face less stress during separation.

Discussing a prenuptial agreement isn’t unromantic—it’s a practical step for protecting both parties.

Myth 5: You Can’t Get Divorced Without a Lawyer

Some believe hiring a lawyer is unnecessary if they’re filing for divorce. While it’s possible to handle divorce without legal help, it’s often risky.

• Legal guidance: A lawyer assures that your rights are protected and that paperwork is correctly filed. Mistakes in legal documents can lead to serious consequences.

• Understanding the law: Divorce involves intricate regulations, especially concerning property division, child custody, and support payments. Knowledgeable legal representation simplifies the process.

• Avoiding mistakes: Missteps can lead to delays, financial losses, or unfavorable outcomes. Even minor errors can significantly affect the results of your case.

Working with a family law professional can prevent costly errors and provide peace of mind.

Myth 6: Assets Are Always Split 50/50

Another misconception is that marital assets are automatically divided equally. However, property division depends on state laws and individual circumstances.

• Community property states: In some states, assets acquired during marriage are split evenly. This approach assumes that both spouses equally contribute to the marriage.

• Equitable distribution states: Most states divide assets based on fairness, considering factors like income, contributions, and future needs. Fair doesn’t always mean equal.

• Pre-marital and separate property: Assets owned before the marriage or acquired individually (e.g., inheritances) may remain separate. Courts carefully evaluate what qualifies as marital property.

An experienced Washington family law attorney can help you understand how property division laws apply in your situation.

Myth 7: Divorce Always Harms Children

Divorce is undoubtedly challenging for children, but it doesn’t have to be damaging. Parents can take steps to support their children during the transition.

• Open communication: Talking honestly with your kids about the changes helps them feel secure. Avoiding surprises can make the process less intimidating for children.

• Co-parenting strategies: Collaborative parenting can provide stability and consistency. Maintaining a united front reassures children that both parents prioritize their needs.

• Counseling and support: Therapy or support groups can help children process their emotions in healthy ways. Professional guidance can ease the adjustment period.

When parents prioritize their children’s well-being, kids can adjust and thrive despite the divorce.

Myth 8: Divorce Records Are Always Public

While divorce filings are part of public records, certain aspects can remain confidential. Many clients seek privacy when dealing with sensitive matters.

• Sealed records: Sensitive information, such as financial or personal details, can sometimes be sealed upon request. This assures that private matters stay private.

• Alternative dispute resolution: Settling matters privately through mediation keeps details out of the public eye. This approach often appeals to high-profile clients.

• Minimizing exposure: Working with a divorce lawyer can help you manage your case discreetly. Your lawyer can advise on steps to protect your privacy.

If privacy is a concern, discuss options with a family law attorney.

Myth 9: Alimony Is Guaranteed in Every Divorce

Not every divorce involves spousal support. Whether alimony is awarded depends on various factors and the specifics of the marriage.

• Length of the marriage: Longer marriages are more likely to include alimony, while short-term marriages may not warrant support payments.

• Earning capacities: Courts assess whether one spouse needs financial assistance and the other can provide it. Disparities in income often play a significant role.

• State laws: Alimony guidelines vary, with some states favoring rehabilitative support to help one spouse become self-sufficient. Temporary support is common in many cases.

Understanding the conditions under which alimony is granted can clarify expectations.

Myth 10: Divorce Can Be Finalized Quickly

Many people believe they can wrap up a divorce in weeks. However, timelines depend on several factors, and divorces often take longer than expected.

• Mandatory waiting periods: Some states require waiting periods before a divorce is finalized. These periods give couples time to reconsider their decision.

• Contested issues: Disagreements over property, custody, or support can prolong the process. Resolving these disputes takes careful negotiation or court intervention.

• Court schedules: Availability of court dates may also affect timing. Busy court systems often lead to delays in finalizing divorces.

Patience and preparation are key when pursuing a divorce. Consulting a lawyer early can help streamline the process.

Speak to a Divorce Lawyer

Divorce can be a challenging experience, but separating fact from fiction helps you approach it with confidence. Do you need flexible, high-quality legal representation that’s accessible and affordable? From our virtual platform, Attorney Himes serves clients throughout Vancouver, Washington, and all cities in Clark County. Contact Keystone Family Law today to schedule a consultation.